Throughout my life, I have never really been that much of a fitness fanatic. In fact, you couldn’t get me to set foot in a gym, even if you paid me. However, in November 2025 I realised that I wasn’t getting any younger and it was getting increasingly difficult to keep up with my kids. So I decided it was time to take control of my health so that I could be the best version of myself, not only for my family, but for myself.

So, I did the hard thing… I walked into a gym, signed up for a membership, and I got to work. Honestly, it was one of the best decisions I ever made. Was it terrifying? Yes. I felt so out of place, and I had absolutely no idea what I was doing… but I pushed through the discomfort and I not only learnt the social rules of the gym (which was possibly the hardest part for me, being an autistic girly), but I also figured out a routine that worked for me and was actually giving me results.

Fast-forward to January 2026… I was thriving with my new routine, and daily movement of my body had become a non-negotiable. Not only was I seeing and feeling the results of all my hard work with my body changing shape and me feeling stronger, energised and happier, but adding a gym session to my day added some structure in my day that provided a moment that was just for me and helped me to regulate my nervous system.

Then my routine was suddenly disrupted when I pulled both of my calf muscles. Yes, I injured not one, but BOTH of my calf muscles. How? Well, this mama had herself a girls’ night out and danced for 5 hours straight without a break, after also having been at the gym that morning. I had such a fun time, but as someone who doesn’t get out a lot and was excited for a night out, I did party way too hard, and my body let me know the hard way that I definitely am not in my 20s anymore!

Anyway, I digress…

My routine had suddenly changed, which is not a great thing for an autistic individual who thrives on routine (yes, me, I’m the autistic individual who thrives on routine). With that loss of routine came a lot of dysregulation and overwhelm. I did try to serve my body and my mind during this time to allow my body to heal and I threw myself into my cozy hobbies. I did some reading, played Nintendo, and caught up on my watchlist. However, I am also a parent, so I had a lot of responsibilities on top of trying my best to serve my body and allow it to heal. However, trying to relax with a 5-year-old and a 3-year-old around who are also both neurodivergent is basically impossible, and the more dysregulated I got, the more dysregulated they became, and we were stuck in this horrible cycle of dysregulation all week. I did my best to support them and provide them with the outlets that they needed to help calm their nervous systems and keep their cups filled… but with not being able to get to the gym or go for a walk, I didn’t have an outlet to help regulate my nervous system and I really struggled to survive the week emotionally.

But it wasn’t just my emotional state that took a hit through the week… my body suffered too and my entire nervous system felt like it was in survival mode. I am really surprised by how much my body has come to rely on that dopamine hit from exercising and moving my body each day, and how much it affected me to not exercise for a whole week.

Here is exactly how a week without exercise affected me:

My mental health suffered

I had a massive increase in my anxiety, intrusive thoughts, and RSD (rejection sensitivity dysphoria). I could not process or regulate my emotions, so I had more frequent anger outbursts and meltdowns. I felt guilty about not being able to control my emotions and for my outbursts. By day 4, I became depressed and began to withdraw from my family by burying my face in my phone to doom scroll and even isolating myself in another room or in a corner of a room if I had to be in the same room.

My nutrition suffered, and therefore so did my body

Without all of that exercise burning calories, my interoceptive challenges peaked, and I had a lot of difficulty identifying when I was hungry and thirsty. I tried to keep my eating routine, but that fell apart by day 3 because eating when I do not feel hungry makes me feel really nauseous. This lead to me mindlessly snacking because I couldn’t tell how hungry I actually was and I had no structure around my meals as I had done no meal prepping for the week. This snacking caused a lot of bloating and gut issues, which increased my nausea and decreased my desire to eat. So I was skipping meals both because I just didn’t feel like eating or because I had just simply forgotten to eat. This was the case for hydration too; I kept forgetting to drink because I wasn’t feeling as thirsty as usual. So I became dehydrated and undernourished… which fed into my poor mood and mental health deterioration.

My nervous system suffered, and with it, my energy levels suffered

Without dopamine and endorphins boosting me, or nutrition and hydration fueling me, and no way to regulate my nervous system, my energy levels plummeted… yet somehow I was still feeling wired. I was in a weird state of being wired but tired, which is a common state for many neurodivergent individuals to be in when they are experiencing feelings of neurodivergent burnout and sensory overload (which I very much was experiencing). I was on high alert due to anxiety and stress, which meant I couldn’t relax, and I wasn’t sleeping well. All the work I had put into improving my executive functioning over the previous couple of months had broken down and I really struggled with basic daily tasks like knowing how to pack the kids’ bags for daycare, preparing food, and household chores like loading/unloading the dishwasher and doing the laundry, as well as trouble staying focused on my current task with multiple distractions bidding for my attention and struggling with, impaired impulse control making it difficult for me to think before acting (contributing to my emotional outbursts and meltdowns as I could not stop to think and process before reacting). I was having a really rough time and I was deep in survival mode with varying moments of fight-flight-freeze.

It wasn’t easy, but I had to allow myself to lean into a phase of recovery because my body was literally screaming for it. Even though it set off a torturous amount of turmoil to not move my body in the ways that it had become accustomed to, it was a week of allowing my body the rest and recovery that it so severely needed. I spent time reading books, catching up on my watchlist, playing Nintendo, and journaling. I just had a really slow week, reconnecting with all the cozy things that bring me joy… which all actually turned out to be a great reminder of the importance of having slow days and incorporating rest and recovery into my routine.

Love & light,

Petra 💖

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